I Yam What I Yam

"And I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has enabled me, for that He counted me faithful, putting me into the ministry; who was before a blasphemer, and a persecutor, and injurious: but I obtained mercy, because I did it ignorantly and in unbelief.
And the grace of our Lord was exceeding abundant with faith and love which is in Christ Jesus.
This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptance, that Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners; of whom I am chief. Howbeit for this cause I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might show forth all longsuffering, ..."
~ 1 Timothy 1:12-16

I hear a lot of teaching and preaching today about who we are in Christ. I pick up bits and pieces of it as I channel surf sometimes. But what I hear is very often only one side of the equation.

We are more than conquerors through Him who loved us (Romans 8:37). Chosen people, and a royal priesthood (1 Peter 2:9). Heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ (Romans 8:17). The head and not the tail (Deuteronomy 28:13). And on ... and on.
All true. All of this is in God's Word concerning His people. But there's more.

I heard my pastor say recently, "I bring to God what I am. Not what I wish I was. Not what I want to be or what I or anyone else thinks I ought to be."
When I came to Christ I came with a lot of baggage. So did you. Now, nearly twenty eight years later, a lot of that stuff has been dealt with. But I find I'm still toting some of that stuff around. And I've even picked up some more along the way. Now I've got some 'churchy, christian-ese' type baggage I don't think He ever meant for me to pick up along the way.

So even as I am everything God's Word says I am, I'm also a work in process. That can be quite frustrating. It can also look like a real train wreck at times. In his later life, Paul seems to have seen this dichotomy of the Christian life. I am everything God's Word says that I am as a follower of the Lord Jesus. But I'm also uniquely me. And that 'me part' comes with baggage.

Early in his ministry, Paul referred to himself as "the least of the apostles" (1 Corinthians 15:9). Later he called himself "the least of all the saints" (Ephesians 3:8). It was only after many years as he neared the end of his life and ministry he came to see himself as "chief among sinners."
I must never get so carried away with who I am in Christ that I forget I am utterly hopeless if not for His mercy and grace. "Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners - of who I am chief." Not 'was chief '. Not 'used to be chief.' I still am.

Like Popeye used to say: "I yam what I yam."